(April 8, 2005) — Where one will find bloody razor blades on the ground, one will find scene kids with their absolutely god-awful nasal voiced and static guitar driven anthems of teen angst and heartbreak. And the “scene” won’t really stop until they realize how to slit their wrists the right way. We’ve had enough of them on MTV, had enough of them on MTV2, had enough of them on MySpace, had enough of them in our neighborhood, and now the least we need is a new burgeoning scene of pop culture trash. The same was said about rockabilly back in the day. But come on, they didn’t advocate bisexualityand attempted, emphasis on ATTEMPTED suicide as a new trend. Is this what has become of our youth? So why let it? If the world wasn’t bleak and depressing enough, now it has become cool to exemplify it. Die your hair black, turn your skin a deathly pale a la Michael Jackson via corpse paint, and scream, because really, it’s the thing to do. In all seriousness, making yourself look depressed and angry, like a hormone-imbalanced monkey, doesn’t really fulfill its purpose, but rather makes you a laughingstock of anyone who has some sense left in their head. The world is depressing. Don’t make it seem cool. Then there is “scene” music. What this pile of garbage sums up is nothing more than a eunuch screaming accompanied by two heavily overdriven guitars playing the exact same thing with incoherent drum bashing, which accurately simulates the effect of ogres dancing on my face and dicing my legs into little pieces with scimitars. What this can mean for some is cacophony more irritating than a ring modulator going nuts, and for most, another reason to hate teenages. For the many musically talented also, this brings one to ponder: what bounds of sensible musical theory is constituted by screaming, and monotonous walls of noise that is the harmony? What is to be obtained from the listening of screamo music? Perhaps we shall never know. But it’s okay, let’s scream and cry together. The error is not really in the development of a “scene”; scenes like rock ‘n roll, jazz and the beat geneartion, defined some of the greatest eras. But it’s in the values made “trendy” that don’t really pass of as revolutionary or progressive. If anything it just leads up quicker to our decline. If one thinks being bisexual is a trend and something to cement their status in the ranks of “cool,” then there’s obviously somehting sticky going on in the cerebrum of that fellow. This has been an issue with this current “scene.” Althought it does not apply to all, it really goes to show that for our geneartion, what was once taboo is now a fad, and subsequently offends the real homosexuals who hvae been longin gfor acceptance since the dawn of time. And of course! Your son or daughter is really going to like it and brag to her friends: “My daddy was a bisexual in high school!” As if they weren’t ridiculous enough, those girl’s pants look real good on you, sonny. Good going scene kids, thanks for making the youth demographic look ever more childish and immature.